Three months ago I lost my footing on my life. What I had planned for my future and was about to put to work fell off from under me.
You see, I was the kind of person who believed strongly in trying to make my dreams come true. I had spent a lot of time pondering quotes about success and the ideas that always rolled through my mind were:
“Don’t settle for anything less”
“Go forth and live the life you imagine”
“Anything is possible”
“Strong desire is the greatest requisite to acheive a dream”
That is the general gist of what I grasped from those quotes I spent most of my days checking on at least once. These ideas had the power to push me to try for my dreams. But I just kept stacking failed endeavours up. Then I had the bright idea to go back to college and study for my masters. The corporate world which I had been escaping from, for more shiny possibilities all of a sudden seemed to be a good idea. I craved stability, I craved security, something sure. I had been chasing “frivolities” for long enough. So I applied for a dual masters degree program in Financial investment and Supply chain Management and got accepted. WOOHOO! I prayed and sowed seed so that God will respond by providing the finances I needed for my studies. God is amazing. But I didn’t fully trust God. You see, I was one foot in and one foot out as a christian. I found a way by which God could bless me for this purpose. I had a boyfriend who had a lot of money (from not very legal sources) and I had hopes that he could finance my next step. Why I said God is amazing is because he did not let these plans to come to pass. God took me to a place where I could do nothing other than turn to him. Long story short, lack of legal documents required prevented me from moving forward with the plan. Oh and be assured I had PRAYED for the documents required, way ahead of time.So here I was: I had no finances, no home and I was scared. After stumbling about and looking for a sure footing I gradually turned home, to God. I was blessed enough to have a friend leave his appartment at my disposal while he was on vacation. That is when I dug into the word of God, watched preachers online and released myself to prayer like never before.
A month ago I wrote a list of things I called DIFFICULTIES
-Reading and concentrating
-Getting up early
-Having a positive mentality
-Overcoming fear of noise
Today I look at the list and I smile. The Bible says God’s word is able to build you up Acts 20:32 . Today I have strength, strength to trust God which comes from trusting God! I talk to myself daily in positive affirmations, most from the scriptures. I have an attitude of no-matter-what because whether I go up or down, I am going with God and it is all working for my good Romans 8:28. And I realise what I wasn’t doing right as a christian before so I am committed to doing them right.